In early December I got into a conversation with an acquaintance who was raised on a farm in rural Mississippi. The mice were starting to run rampant in the barn, so one day when he was about seven or eight years old, his grandmother called him over and had him kill all the mice one by one with a pitchfork. After relating this story, he told me, "I really think people who have been brought up on farms have the greatest respect for life of any people."
I thought about what he said, my brain buzzing with cognitive dissonance. My dad grew up on a family dairy farm in northern Minnesota. He declined taking on the farm, saying "there's no living in it," (which was sadly true), and went to college and became a research scientist instead. Yet every year he went back Up North to go deer hunting with his brothers. We'd hear tires crunching gravel, then run to watch from the front window as they strung the deer up, blood dripping and making a red mess in the pure white snow. One year I told my little cousin, "Your dad shot Bambi's mom," and he cried for half an hour. Not one of my finest moments, but it was my true sentiment. Having grown up in the suburbs eating meat that came from styrofoam packages covered with plastic wrap, I thought my dad and uncles were callous and cruel. I didn't understand their need to "go out and kill something" at all.
But then we all moved to Seattle, and my dad didn't go deer hunting anymore, and I didn't really think about it much until my friend's pitchfork tale. Then I struggled: pairing "killing mice with a pitchfork" with "respect for life." Then something clicked: No matter what we do, others must die so that we may live. Maybe people who live on farms understand this better than most, because they witness it firsthand. Maybe the question is not "What should I eat?" Maybe the question is, "How can I live in a manner that is most respectful of life?" (For what it's worth, I have long believed that anyone who respects life on this planet would do better to fight corporate control of the world's resources rather than simply stop eating meat.)
With these thoughts fresh in my mind, and feeling ornery about the approach of Christmas and my annual inexplicable need to work myself to the point of absolutely insufferable irritability for a meal that no one was truly excited about, I decided to lobby for a Christmas ham. I did this by picking an argument with my husband wherein I questioned the ethics of his vegetarianism.
I asked him, "What if you have to kill a hundred mice to protect the grain that makes your bread? How is that better than killing one pig for a ham?"
He didn't have an answer to that question. Or rather, he has several answers, but he's still thinking about it. So did we have ham for Christmas dinner? No, we had vegetarian lasagna with red sauce. But however our argument ends, I think we both agree that logic alone does not control our food choices. That, and nothing beats the sheer determination of the Tamil Brahmin vegetarian to not eat meat or have it cooked in the home. (Sorry, no pictures. I was too busy with life. Here's a picture of the new casserole dish I bought, sure to be the vessel of many Christmas lasagnas to come.)
Posts
4 comments:
love it--but it does make some difference to just stop eating meat (or eating less meat)....right? less resources to make the food, some health difference, more fiber, less saturated fat, easier digestion, etc.....this is assuming heavy meat consumption to very little or none....
I do think you're right --eating less meat *is* better environmentally, and eating non-industrial meat is the way to go. But also, giving up meat without being concerned about making changes to the greater structure (structure which is the source of our trouble in the first place) is ultimately fruitless. Ha ha. Pun intended. ;o)
Interesting post - I am more in admiration of my mum who would kill an animal to eat it than others in my family who hate the idea of killing animals and just want to eat their meat without knowing where it came from.
As a vegetarian, I understand that it isn't for everyone but I do like my safe space at home where we don't have chunks of meat. Glad you can find a bit of peace with vegetarian lasagne
Thanks for reading, Johanna. I agree with you about respecting people who have the courage to face where their meat comes from. Most of the time I am more than at peace with eating vegetarian. I actually prefer it. It's just these difficult times where I have to cook in my own home for people who don't share my dietary preferences. But I liked in your own post where you emphasized that it's more about people just being together. More than anything, I was just feeling burned out by it all, and as everyone knows, the best way to deal with burn out is picking a fight with one's spouse!
Post a Comment